Jun 03 2007
An Open Letter to the Opposite Sex
Dear Fellas,
If you would like to successfully hit on or pick up a girl, there are some things we feel we need to share with you.
First of all, please don’t come with any “lines” that include what type of car you drive. And if you are an Olympic Gold Medalist, don’t start off the convo by mentioning your medal haul. It makes you look like an ass.
Also, it is recommended that you not approach every single female at a party with the same tired lines. Switch it up a little and stop trying to be so desperate.
Asking a female if she wants to go back to your place too soon will also bring unfortunate results. Major turnoff. Slow it down a little.
If it appears your party strategy is not working, and other party-goers start laughing at your failed attempts, it is time to leave; while you still have a shred of dignity left.
The best way to get a girl is to drop the “lines” and be real. Talk to her. Be nice. Make her laugh.
Respectfully Yours,
The Swim Aids
P.S. We thought we’d share this open letter because if we hear one more story about a certain someone making an ass out of himself around his campus, we may all die of laughter. We thought that these type of stories would stop coming in after a couple of years…
They do not.
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10 Responses to “An Open Letter to the Opposite Sex”
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I officially co-sign this post… Seriously? Since when does telling a girl what kind of car you drive even WORK? Men like that = losers
HAHAHAHAHA! wait, is this real? is this about who i think it is?!?!?! BTW, i’m brandy!
I’m so glad my story inspired this post!!! “And I told him F*** NO!”
this cracks me up. i hope in the next ten years they will stop popping up..but i cant guarantee that. hahah
Ten years? hahahaha puh-leeeeeze! He barely has game now! Girls will have HAD to learn by then… right? If not, I might just die a little inside…
If he’s still uttering these lines in 10 years, not only will he be “the old guy at the party”, but he will also claim the title of “saddest man ever”.
Okay…..Am I the only one who’s confused???? Who are we talking about???…..Or are we not saying his name?
I think I have an idea as to who this is about… but I’m going to bite my tongue. I don’t want to get anyone in trouble! HAHAHA!
hahaha you know he would take the title as the “old guy at the party that uses sad pick up lines”. Still be using the ever classic sad line of :” i have an olympic gold medal”
He’ll be just as much a loser then, as he is now!